Monday, January 17, 2011

new blue toothbrush: a poem

New blue toothbrush.
A gift bestowed upon me by my hygienist at my last dentist appointment.
Emerging from a plastic bag with a cartoon tooth on it.
Responsible for meeting my oral needs.
Foreign stranger to my mouth,
I hope we will be better acquainted soon.
Such stiff, short bristles
cause pain and irritation to my receding gums.
So much that I dread the morning and the night
when it is necessary to use you.
It simply isn't fair!
Must you be so harsh?
Can't I just get away with merely flossing regularly instead?

I am doubtful that you will ever live up to your predecessor,
old green toothbrush.
Your bristles will never be as soft.
Your grip will never be as streamlined.
Brushing twice a day used to be an absolute joy.
And now I'd much rather have gingivitis.
Old green toothbrush,
come back to me!
New blue toothbrush,
get out!
You've already broken my heart.
Please don't also break my teeth.


  1. I'm pretty proud of this one, not gonna lie. It might just be my best work of 2011 so far!