Saturday, October 30, 2010

sarah's list of scary things!

It's Halloween tomorrow! In honor of this day, I thought that I would present to you a list of things that are scary!

1. Responsibility
2. Sharks
3. Dinosaurs
4. Lorne Michaels
6. Wasps
7. Waiting rooms
8. Clowns
9. Celery
10. Driving in terrible road conditions.

If you didn't like that list, then surely you will enjoy this Charizard jack-o-lantern. Have a happy and safe Halloweiner everyone!

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

some interesting facts about adam diMarco

This is my friend Adam:

Sadly, Adam does not have a real mustache. Perhaps one day he will. Until then, I will entertain you all with *true facts about Adam.

(*Note= not all facts may be true.)

FACT. I was in class with Adam for a whole year. Not even kidding. From August 2009-August 2010. So I've known him for 365+ days. And of those 365+ days, I managed to have a crush on him for one full day. Congratulations Adam, that's longer than most of the crushes I've had on other guys! (jkit'stheshortestcrusheverplzdon'tfeelbad). But for that one day, I felt super awkward and clumsy around him and I blushed when he'd look at me but then I got over it. It was just a phase. Adam isn't in my class anymore and it's kind of weird, but Tanaya is in my class and she is Adam's other half (or better half? YOU DECIDE).

FACT. Adam is of Italian descent in case you're blind and couldn't tell from the picture. But then I would ask you what are you doing on the internet if you're blind? No offense to blind people, but how would you be reading this? Anyway, Adam does not speak Italian, but I do! How funny would it be if I made this whole post in Italian so he couldn't understand it? And then he'd copy-paste it into Google Translate and get a broken English version of it. THAT WOULD BE HYSTERICAL.

FACT. My favorite memory of Adam is... never mind. I don't want to share it on the internet. He knows what I'm talking about anyway.

FACT. One time, Adam came over for dinner. When he got to my apartment he took off his pants and... again, I don't think I should post this on the internet.

FACT. I can't think of an appropriate Adam related story to post on my blog so I will just play an 80's style montage of Adam memories in my head. Thank you for your time.

Monday, October 25, 2010

sarah's top 5 animated villains

1. Negaduck from Darkwing Duck.

Negaduck is probably the most badass villain on Darkwing Duck. I mean, boyfriend IS just an alternative version of DW after all. He's also the leader of the Fearsome Five, and is definitely the most evil person to ever terrify the fair city of St. Canard.

2. Team Rocket from Pokemon.

Team Rocket is definitely the most adorable group of villains on this list. I mean, they shouldn't really even be classified as villains since they haven't ever been successful in doing anything "evil". But they're so cute with their matching outfits and talking Meowth and long motto that a large part of me always kind of wants them to catch a break and steal that Pikachu once and for all. And what's their story anyway? Lots of people claim that James is gay but sometimes you'll catch a moment between them that's filled with sexual tension. Are they or aren't they? Will we ever find out?

3. Sideshow Bob from The Simpsons.

The last thing you hear before you die: show tunes. Say what you will about the quality of The Simpsons in recent years, but you can't deny that episodes with Sideshow Bob are always top notch. I mean, dude is voiced by Kelsey Grammer! I'm pretty sure that man was created for the sole purpose of providing voices for cartoon villains. I mean, he's voiced other kind of characters, sure, but they all sucked. I wonder why Kelsey Grammar doesn't narrate things the way Morgan Freeman does. He should.

4. Hexxus from Ferngully.

Holy shit, where do I begin? I didn't watch Ferngully for nearly 10 years because Hexxus scared me so much. What the fuck is he anyway? One minute he's a sludgy skeleton, and the next he's this singing cloud of gas. Hexxus is voiced by the one and only Tim Curry. And he sings a song about pollution and I gotta say, for a children's movie, it's pretty sexual. That's kind of ridiculous. I mean, the film's whole message is about how we need to preserve the environment, and yet they make pollution sound like the sexiest fucking thing in the whole world. I'm not even kidding! You can listen to the song here.

5. Dr. Reginald Bushroot from Darkwing Duck.

Dr. Bushroot makes me sad. He wasn't evil before he became half plant-half duck. He was always picked on by his colleagues and so after his accident, he had a lot of built up anger issues and thus became a villain (see kids, THIS is why you shouldn't bully others). I think it'd be super sweet if he was in a movie where he had to battle Hexxus. Remind me to write that screenplay later. Anyway, it disappoints me that he chose to use his plantlike abilities for evil rather than good. Who doesn't like a man that likes flowers?

Thursday, October 21, 2010

ode to megan!

This is my friend Megan. Don't even pretend that she's not the hottest thing you've ever seen because nobody will believe you. NOBODY! Holy shit, you should hear her sing. AMAZING! But enough about Megan and more about why I like her.

Megan is possibly the sweetest girl ever. She's always willing to listen to me when I have drunk crying sessions and sometimes (and by sometimes I really mean often) we talk about our mutual friends and how much we love them and how much they make us sad when they are sad. Oh and she has a pretty impeccable taste in men, if I do say so myself.

I must share with you all what had inspired me to dedicate this post to Megan. She sent me the most epic of epic messages one could ever get. This message was entitled "How to Put Yourself Inside of Megan's Apartment". Inspired by this video:

(at first I embedded the video into my blog, but it messed up the layout and that displeased me so I will just link you to it).

The message itself is below. It is, of course, edited because as if I'm going to post someone's address on the internet for everyone to see. Keep dreaming, potential perverts (and might I say, I've been really good with alliterations lately. GO ME!).

You'll get off the bus in front of a Safeway. DO NOT go into that Safeway; that is not where I live. I live in another place that is not a grocery store.

Cross the street towards the McDonalds. I also don't live in the McDonalds, so don't be fooled. It is merely a landmark on the journey to putting yourself inside Megan's apartment.

Keep going straight along Cardero for one block, through a little bike park. Then you will be at ________ St. Turn right. Halfway down that block is **** ________ St., which is the building I live in. It is also called ***** Manor, but despite this confusing moniker, not everyone who lives in this building is called *****. To call all people emerging from this building "*****" would result in little more than confusion and embarrassment.

The door to the building is glass, which means that it is see-through, but its transparency does not mean that you can also walk through it; to do so would be ill-advised and injurious to your health. Instead, turn your head slightly to the left of the door, where there is a buzzer and a set of numbered buttons.

You will enter the number "***" into the buzzer pad. At first this may cause some consternation, as a cursory examination of the pad will clearly indicate that it only goes as high as the number nine, let alone well into the high hundreds. But fear not! You will accomplish this seemingly impossible task by first depressing the number *, then *, then * again. (Upon reflection, you will likely realize that these three buttons combine to create the triple-digit code listed above). Once you have completed this, engage patiently while the panel activates and makes a "ring" or "tone" sound.

Shortly thereafter, you should hear a voice issuing from the panel; if you have performed the previous step correctly, that voice should be mine (if it is not, graciously excuse yourself, disconnect and repeat the above dialing process). NOTE: my voice issuing from the panel should not be taken as evidence that I live inside the panel, and to attempt to detach the panel and thus free me from my electronic prison would likely result in interference from the building management or proper authorities. Once we have confirmed each others' identities, I will press a button on my phone that will electronically unlock the outside door to my apartment. You will hear a click and a buzz, whereupon you should grasp the handle of the glass door firmly, tug it towards you and pass through the opening created, allowing the door to close behind you once you have entered.

You are now in the lobby of my building. Congratulations! Stride forcefully towards the wood-paneled door directly ahead of you (a confident walk is necessary, for elevators are sensitive and may not respond to a fearful call); take care to stop soon enough that you not collide with the door, but you will see two buttons by the side of the elevator and you must stop within reach of them. Depress the button with an arrow that points upwards.

(Pro Tip: Not sure which way is up? Take a pencil, coin or other small item; hold it extended away from your body and then release it from your hand, so that it falls. The direction opposite to the way the object falls is up.)(Be sure to retrieve your small item after you have done this, particularly if it is a coin, which can be exchanged for goods and services.)

Once you have depressed the "up" button, you should wait patiently until the doors of the elevator open. When they do, walk forward into the elevator, taking care not to collide with the back wall. Once your whole body is inside the elevator, stop and turn to face the direction from which you have just come; you will notice a panel of numbered buttons that were previously hidden from view by dint of your spatial orientation. You may feel overwhelming exhaustion at the sight of further buttons but do not be alarmed: this task is much simpler than the previous numbered buttons, as you must only press one of them.

Press the button marked "*". Momentarily, the doors to the elevator should close, and the elevator itself will begin to rise upwards with you inside of it, on its way to the *****th floor. Please note that if other people are in the elevator with you, they may disembark at other floors that are NOT the *****th floor, and you may need to use quick judgment skills to determine whether their leaving the elevator is an indication that you, too, should leave the elevator. If the elevator stops on floors *-* then, regardless of the actions of others, you should remain inside it, confident that your destination has not yet been reached.

Upon arrival at the *th floor (Pro Tip: there is a panel of number-shaped lights above the elevator door; the number which is lit correlates exactly with the floor the elevator is currently on), exit the elevator and turn to your left. Once you have done that, you will notice that a door bearing the number "***" is merely a few steps forward and to the left of you. Approach this door and knock your fist against it between two and five times (be creative!) to create a series of sharp sounds, which will alert me (on the other side of the door) that you are hoping to put yourself inside my apartment, and are only separated from your goal by the unfortunate fact of the door. I will thus endeavour to remove this final obstacle by unlocking and opening the door, allowing you entrance into my apartment, whereupon we will celebrate your success in a manner to be determined at the time.

I hope these instructions are detailed enough, and look forward to your visit!
Did you know that Megan also has a blog? Check out what she has to say at!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

5 jobs I'd consider having

I am currently none of these things, but I wouldn't mind being one of these things! LOL! (I hate myself right now)

1. Kindergarten Teacher. I know what you're all thinking. You're thinking, "Sar-AH! Who would WANT to work with children!?" But think about it... kindergarten classes end at noon depending on the school. Not to mention that you're pretty much getting paid to colour and sing songs and read books and ... NAP! Need I say more? The best part of all is that these kids won't bother you with their relationship problems and drama because they probably don't have any. And summers off? Sign me up for this sweet gig!

2. Flight Attendant. I travel more than the average person probably does, so I've encountered many flight attendants over the years. I've come to decide that the job is pretty rad. I mean, all you pretty much have to do is make sure people are wearing their seat belts properly and sling drinks and peanuts. I should also mention the cute outfits that you'd get to wear. Fantastic!

3. Animal Rescuer. I don't know if this is a paid job, but I would do it for free if I had the time. I LOOOOOOOVE animals and I kind of really wanna adopt a whole bunch of injured/abandoned/abused animals and nurse them back to health! And then train them to attack people I hate.

4. Critic. Restaurant and Film alike. Getting paid to go out for dinner and watch movies? I'm down.

5. Samantha Jones. At first I was gonna say "Whore", but I that's not entirely accurate. Then I decided, I want to be Samantha Jones from Sex and the City! I mean, girlfriend is so badass. She has sex with whoever she wants and doesn't apologize for it. I think we can all take a page from her book. I'm not sure how being Samantha Jones would work as a full time job, but if I can find a way to get paid for being a fabulous bitch I'll have it made for life.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

the shitlist

We all knew that this was coming.

The Shitlist

1. Celery. Celery is possibly the most disgusting thing one could ever put into their bodies. Everything about it putrid... the way it tastes, the way it smells, the strings that stick out when other people (because I would never indulge in such a vile vegetable) eat it... ughhh. There's really no amount of cream cheese or peanut butter that you can put on your celery stick to make it appetizing. Nope.
2. Onions. I hate onions almost as much as I hate celery, but not quite as much. I can handle onions sometimes.
3. Mamma Mia! Just to clarify, I'm talking about the movie adaptation, not the musical itself. The musical is quite enjoyable, actually. If you ever get a chance to see it, I would recommend it. But the movie, oy. I am quite convinced that this movie was the most tragic event to ever happen to cinema. It seems that I am in the minority of holding this opinion, but I mean come on people, even Meryl Streep couldn't save this movie.
4. The Vancouver Canucks. I'm not sure if my beef is with the team itself, or their fan base. It's rare that I meet a Canucks fan that doesn't take my disdain for their team as a personal insult to them as a person. I'm definitely not saying that all of their fans are like that, but a lot of them are. Like, it was so bad last season that CBC did a story on the news about how unsportsmanlike their fans were. Not gonna lie, I'm nervous about writing this on the internet. I could be a target for their next hate crime.
5. Arnold from The Magic School Bus. Shut up, nobody else wants a normal field trip, so stop complaining.
6. Twilight. ARRRRRRGH there are like a million reasons to hate Twilight. Did it dawn on anyone that these books are based off of Stephenie Meyer's wet dreams? And that wouldn't be so bad if she didn't keep repeating the facts that Edward Cullen as "topaz eyes" and "marble skin" and a "velvet voice". And AND how about the fact that she goes on for pages and pages describing mundane things in detail, completely to the point where I get bored and pick up the closest Harry Potter book instead.
7. Having no money. This is pretty self explanatory.
8. When creepy old guys hit on you. Okay, so let me be the first to say that older men can be awesome. But when they're creepy, they're not so awesome. When I was 18 I worked the opening shift at a nearby convenience store, and everyday at 6:30 am this old guy would come in and validate lottery tickets. One day he told me that I had pretty hair. I was like, "oh, kay... thanks..." because it kind of came out of nowhere and something seemed malicious about it. Then the next day he asked me out! I was like, "um, no thanks..." and waited for him to leave the store so I could puke. Yeah, so not nice.
9. Construction zones. I don't know much about Construction Zones in most places, but the ones in Calgary drive me nuts. First of all, there's like, 2394823039209 different construction sites at any time in that city, and they're mostly really big sites that will take several years to finish. I generally don't mind slowing down during construction zones, but when I drive by and see all the workers sitting around doing nothing with their Tim Hortons coffees and donuts, I just lose it. Really?! REALLY!? MY tax dollars are funding YOUR donuts? Fuck off.
10. Bad music when you're sober. This is why I drink.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

ask sarah segment 1

You may be wondering where I've been lately. You probably assumed that I puked myself to death. But you would be wrong! I'm merely only suffering from writer's block. So ladies and gentlemen, I thought I would introduce an "Ask Sarah" segment to my show....... I mean blog.... blog. This is where I tackle all the hard hitting questions that teens have today. Man, I wish I had my own talk show and did this everyday.

1. What did you eat for breakfast today?
That's a very excellent question. The time is currently 11:05 AM, and I haven't had breakfast yet. I'm thinking about making some scrambled eggs, but toast is also an option. I'll have to get back to you on this.

2. What's your earliest memory?
Well, I guess I'd have to say the day my brother was born. Or maybe that was a dream...

3. If you were given a brand new yacht, what would you name it?
Wow, what a great question! I don't know much about the naming process of yachts, but I imagine the name would have something to do with puking or multiples of 5.

4. Have you ever broken any bones? If so, how?

5. If you could only watch one TV show, what would it be?
This is the dumbest question ever. If I could only watch one TV show, I would sell my TV and go on the internet. Dumbass.

I'm afraid that's all the time we have for today. Thank you for participating in today's show! Tune in next time where I answer even more of your great questions!

If you'd like to submit a question, then head on over to

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

top 5 awkward moments of my life so far

In no particular order.

1. I was in my grade 12 social class, spacing out and chewing gum like a lazy motherfucker with my mouth open, and the gum fell out of my mouth and onto the floor. My initial reaction was sheer embarrassment, and I frantically looked around to see if anyone near me saw it. Nobody did. But the shame never went away and I carry it around with me everyday.

2. Again in grade 12, my parents took me and my brother to see Borat. Which is like, one of the most awkward movies you could watch with your parents, but my parents are pretty cool so that was fine. But it was kind of lame being 16 and going to a movie with your mom and dad and little brother. The worst part of this experience was when the movie was over me and my mom waited outside of theatre 8 because my dad and brother were using the washroom. This guy that I was hardcore crushing on came out of the theatre with his friends and omg I died. The next school day when he saw me he was like, "Did your parents like the movie?" omg I'm crying right now just thinking about it.

3. Last Christmas, I flew home from Vancouver to Calgary. I was using the self check in machine and I must've looked confused because a nice WestJet employee came over to help me. When my boarding pass had been printed, she turned to me and said, "have a nice flight!" I then replied with, "you too!" I should've just played off that faux pas (awesome word) like it was nothing, but I realized my horrible mistake and immediately said, "OH NO THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!" The employee was super cool about it though. She was like, "oh honey, I wish I was flying today!" and then I smiled and ran away. I wish I could be as cool as her.

4. On Sunday, we were having our big family Thanksgiving dinner. I proudly walked into my aunt and uncle's kitchen where my extended family was and gave my best, most flamboyant "HAAAAAY!" expecting them to laugh or even say "HAAAAY" back to me. Nobody said anything. They all stared.

5. When I was 18, me and my mom made plans to go see a play at Stage West in Calgary. In case you don't know what that is, it's this kind of dinner theatre production company. So me and my mom had our dinner, and then the show started. Halfway through the show, I puked. I awkwardly and silently ran to the bathroom and continued puking for like, 10 minutes. When I thought it was done (keyword thought), I got some paper towel and tried to wipe the puke off my sweater. This is where it got super awkward. I was in the middle of trying in vain to clean myself up, when this old lady came into the washroom. She looked at me and was like, "did you spill?" and I was like, "no I threw up", and there was a REALLY REALLY LONG PAUSE and she was like, "that's a shame." and ran out. Some other fun facts about that night: Everything I ate came out in reverse order. I puked in a bucket in the backseat of my car for the whole ride home, and then I eventually started puking blood. Yep, great night.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

5 people I fantasize about

1. Tina Fey.

Tina is my ultimate girl crush and main source of inspiration. I think she's actually getting hotter over time. I mean, girlfriend turned 40 this year, and look at her. I really hope that I get to work with her someday because I know that we will be bffs. Then one night I'll invite her over for dinner and we'll sit on my couch sipping wine and there will be a tender moment and then I will kiss her. She will pull away abruptly and I'll have to make some excuse about not meaning it and things will be awkward forever. Yep, that's gonna happen.

2. Matthew Lombardi

Once upon a time, Matthew Lombardi was a hockey player who played for the Calgary Flames. I would attend these games and gaze upon the man who was pure sex on ice. Back in 2009, he got traded to the Phoenix Coyotes and I locked myself in my room for a week and cried. Not joking, I really did. Secretly I still pretend that he plays for the Flames, and I have hope that Daryl Sutter will get him to come back. Matthew Lombardi taught me that it's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all ~*~.

3. Elijah Wood

This takes me back to when I was 12. I used to pretend that I was gonna marry him and have his hobbit babies. At my 13th birthday party me and my friends rented a bunch of his movies and watched them. Including Flipper. Especially Flipper. Great film. Anyway, I haven't stalked Elijah much in my adult life, but if the opportunity came up, I would totally still take it. I owe it to my preteen self.

4. Jane Lynch

So, I really don't like Glee. I think it's the most irritating show on TV right now, but that's a rant for another day. I keep torturing myself by watching Glee every week because of Jane Lynch. I'm not exactly sure what it is about her, but I do know that her smile melts my heart.

5. Aladdin. No explanation necessary.

Friday, October 8, 2010

things I am obsessed with

1. Lists. I LOOOOOOOOOOVE lists. I make at least one list every day. Lists of chores, lists of groceries, lists of reasons why I love the people I crush on. EVERYTHING. When I was little I had a whole notebook dedicated to listing things that I loved and hated. I'm am seriously OCD about lists and nothing gives me more pleasure than crossing things off of to do lists.

2. Messy Buns. I have to credit my bff Garrett for this. I am not a fortunate enough person to be able to get away with waking up in the morning and not doing my hair. Sometimes I just don't wanna wash my hair in the morning (gross right?) so I just throw my hair up into a messy bun and go on with my day! The beauty about a messy bun is that there is no wrong way to do it. And believe me ladies, the more hair that falls out of it, the better you will look.

3. Puking. I know this makes me sound like I'm bulimic, but trust me, I'm not. It's not like I walk around TRYING to puke, cause I don't. It's just that all of my best stories end with me puking. My favorite puking story happened a few years ago. I was pretty wasted (understatement of the year) and my dad brought me home from the bar and I immediately ran to the bathroom and spent like an hour puking. Then I demanded my mother to fetch me a glass of water. Apparently she was taking too long because I ended up producing an invisible glass full of invisible water and started invisibly drinking it. I then convinced my parents that my own water was the best water I've ever had and it was a shame that I was not willing to share it. That's right folks, I puked so much that I hallucinated water.

4. Multiples of Five. I cannot stress how much I love multiples of five (in case you can't do math, a multiple of five is any number that ends with a 5 or 0). When I watch TV, I NEVER have the volume set to a number that isn't a multiple of five. Sometimes I'll be like, "If I have one more cocktail, that will make it an even five for me!" and then my friends are like, "SAR-AH! Five isn't an even number!" but little do they know... that it's even for me.

5. NBC. I'm not really that obsessed with NBC, but I like NBC and I wanted this list to be an even five.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

things to be thankful for

The season of Thanksgiving is upon us, and I must say that it is quite possibly my favorite holiday. I mean, Christmastime is rad and all, but it goes on for like 2 months and I'm not ready to get back into my life routine until like, January 15th. Thanksgiving is awesome because it's just a weekend and that is just the amount of time I need to spend with my family before I start hating them. Enough about that shit, today I'm going to list the things I am thankful for.

1. Betty White. If there's one thing the world needs, it's more Betty White. She may look like a precious old lady but we all know that she's a pistol. I want to adopt this woman as my third grandmother. If I make it to 88 and am half as badass as she is, I'll consider myself pretty lucky.

2. All the sexy people I know. There are seriously WAAAAAAAAY too many to list, but they probably know who they are.

3. Peanut M&M's. If M&M's were WWII, Almond M&M's would be the Nazi's and Plain M&M's would be the Jews. Peanut M&M's would be the Allies and... I'd want to eat that war.

4. The fact that I only puked twice this year! Oh wait... maybe three times. I don't even know.

5. Great music came out this year! Sadly horrible music came out this year too... but a lot of it was great!

6. As of tonight, the 2010-2011 NHL Season is underway!

...That's it.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

why being tanaya is so hard

This is my friend Tanaya:

Her life is pretty rough. First of all, everyone thinks she's mysterious but she's really not. She's just another lonely soul looking for a good time. It's really a shame that nobody understands her. Also, everyone mispronounces her name and it's really annoying. I don't know why people fail so hard at saying her name properly, it's pronounced exactly the way it's spelled. Just like Canada. I hate when people say Canada weird, like they're trying to make it sound like some fun exotic place. Yeah, Canada is pretty super bitchin but you can't get away with talking like that here. I'm just kidding, you totally can.

Tanaya is always losing her things. Like today, she left her backpack in the classroom so we had to go back there during lunch hour to find it. It wasn't where she left it so that sucked. Luckily she got it back, but still. The fact that it even happened in the first place was pretty unfortunate.

You should also know that she is a scorned student/jilted lover. I won't go into much detail about that on the internet, but I feel that it should be mentioned.

And she hangs around with this weird kid named Adam. He's okay I guess, but I'm pretty sure he abuses her. I once saw him put bleach in her tea when she wasn't looking. She's in a coma now, and that's why I decided to write about how hard her life is.

Saturday, October 2, 2010


Ladies, you've all done it. Someone pulls out a camera on your night out and at the last minute you have to strike a pose. Whatever will you do? The answer is simple, you pucker your lower lip and curl your upper lip to your nose. The results: ducklips.

Guys seem to have huge hate ons for ducklips. I for one, am a fan. When I'm out with my girls getting sloshed and leading unattractive people on and the camera comes out, I resort to two classic photo techniques; angle pictures and ducklips. Why? Because I'm obviously a party girl! Besides, smiling nicely in pictures is too risky. Everytime I smile like society tells me how I should, a plethora of anxieties overcome me. Am I showing too much gum? Am I squinting too much? Will my phantom lazy eye make an appearance in this photo? Will I sneeze at the last minute? Will this photo go on the internet and greatly reduce the chances of me getting laid?

When I pose with ducklips, these worries don't haunt me as much. I am willing to sacrifice looking like an intelligent young woman rather than be that girl with the weird eye thing. It kind of works out because guys don't really like smart girls anyway. I've been smart my whole life and it hasn't really worked out for me, relationship wise.

I'm going to be getting headshots done soon, and you know how I think I'm gonna pose for them? ducklips and tits pushed together. I want employers to know that I'm a party girl, and not a smart girl!

Ladies, we must fight for our right to ducklip, because it is being threatened every minute, every hour, and every day. Men around the world are campaigning against our default party faces. They must be stopped. If you love your ducklips, show them to world. With no shame or remorse. Have nothing but pride for them. Ducklip your way to the top of the world!