A few weeks ago I found this notebook I used to write in when I was like, 15 and I'd make all my friends read it. I guess it was my 2005 version of blogging? I will share some of it today. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I wrote this or the fact that I actually let people read it.
April 4, 2005
"I am a PRO-WRESTLER!"
April 5, 2005
"Mucous is a nasty word. Never name your kid Mucous."
"They lose at life, and I win."
"When I was 3, I pushed my brother down the stairs. It ruled."
"Nobody that I know of has ever died from being told to fuck off."
April 6, 2005
"Have you ever said 'lol' in real life? I said 'rofl' out loud once. I was embarrassed. I burnt my face off because I was so ashamed. It grew back the next day."
"One time in band class, my teacher asked me to pick a number between 1 and 3, AND I SAID 4! AHHHH!"
April 7, 2005
"My goal in in life is to drastically change everyone's lives. And I'm on a roll today!"
April 12, 2005
"I've decided to shake up the salad of my life."
"I must confess that I'm Romeo's true love. Not Juliet. We met online and it was love at first email."
On a list of "Movies that Rock My World"
-Lord of the Rings (Epic Journey of Hope)
April 18, 2005
"PAPER WASTERS WILL BURN IN HELL!!"
April 19, 2005
"If good ideas were service hours, I'd be out of prison right now.
April 21, 2005 - On a list of "Things I Hate"
-Not knowing the difference between cheese and a white Smarties bar.
April 27, 2005
"All Bono cares about are poor children in other countries. What an asshole!"
April 29, 2005
"The funniest thing anyone has ever said to me: 'Oh, you're talking about your kids! I thought you were naming your tumors!'"
...I am so glad I grew out of this awkward phase.